So you have to give a wedding speech? Well don't panic, help is at hand. If you follow my ten easy-to-follow steps then you will be a roaring success and everyone will love you,(or at least not think you were memorable for all the wrong reasons)

Step One-Define your objectives. In other words are you trying to make people laugh, to thank the beautiful Bridesmaids, to celebrate your love for your bride etc. Each person will have a very different intention for their speech, or at least they are supposed to have! Rather than worrying about being funny and telling a risque joke or funny story about that wild night in Prague, concentrate on being sincere and genuine. You might not be remembered as being outstanding but at least you wont be remembered as the person that made everyone cringe with embarrassment.

Step Two-Keep it Simple. If it takes one sentence to say what you want to say then only take one sentence. Do not spend two to three mminutes trying to say what only needs ten seconds. Keep your sentences short and don't ramble. This avoids the problem of people becoming bored midway through your point. Have each point on a card in front of you in case you start to stray from what you are trying to say.

Step Three-Practise, practise and when you are finished practising go and practise some more. Find someone lucky enough to have the privilege of hearing your speech before anyone else and ask them for feedback. Take it without being too hard on yourself. It's better that someone tells you what you need to hear before you stand up rather than being nervous wondering what people think of it. Know that your speech is good before you actually have to give it. Practise how long certain parts take to develop so that if you are going to tell that story from Prague, at least you will know that it should only last three minutes, not ten like some stories tend to. At this point your audience would have fallen asleep.

Step Four-Coping with nerves-everyone gets nervous before speaking in public. Don't worry it's normal. Remember that your audience are behind you, they want you to be good so they will be very supportive. Being completely prepared is the key to overcoming nervousness. Use positive self-talk to build up your confidence. On the reverse of your speech cards, write positive words to encourage you as you speak. Before speaking, try and stretch your body in whatever way possible. Stress gets into your muscles so keep them relaxed and well stretched. Pretend that you are confident. Pick someone you think is a great speaker and imagine that you are them for the time you have to speak. Act and think like them and pretty soon you will be doing it naturally.

Step Five-Grab their attention. Start your speech with a witty or romantic quotation or a short fable or proverb. Keep people guessing as to what the punchline is. Develop your speech around the theme of the story or quotation and fit it all together as you talk further.

Step Six-Positive Body Language. 85% of what people hear is picked up without you having said a word. Stand straight, dont keep your hands in your pockets, dont fidget, look at individual people and not the entire room. Try and pick a few friendly faces and speak to them. Their smiles will be all the encouragement that you need.

Step Seven-Change your tone. The best speakers are those that vary their tone of voice. Try to avoid speaking in a flat monotone as this guaranteed to ensure that people will end up nodding off, especially if the wine is strong!

Step Eight-Be yourself. I was at a wedding recently where the groom and his father gave two warm, funny and heartfelt speeches that had us all laughing and crying. Then the best man had to give his. He tried to be both funny and warm. It didn't come off very well because he tried to outdo the two before him. Never a good idea. If someone gives a brilliant speech then acknowledge it in your speech and how it has left you trailing in his/her wake. People will admire your humility.

Step Nine-Stay SOBER. This is perhaps the single most important piece of advice I will give you and I am not even going to explain why! It speaks for itself.

Step Ten-Dont take yourself too seriously. There is nothing as bad as listening to someone who is too serious. Weddings are about celebrations and fun so keep the tone and content of your speech nice and lighthearted. Use humour sparingly at the beginning and end of your speech and it will be well remembered. Most of all try to enjoy it, it will only last as long as you want it to!